omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Randomize
