at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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