standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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