I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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