Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
