singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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