Can i not drive my cunt home
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize