ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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