sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
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