Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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