So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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