how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize