We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
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my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
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You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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