Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
