We're like a lot better than the average bears
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
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I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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