she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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