i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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