Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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