I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
