um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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