two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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