you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
