Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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