What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
