Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
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