you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize