The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
this just has baby written all over it
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
