You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
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