I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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