i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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