I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
