did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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