Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
