If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Randomize