we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
