who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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