But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
