Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
This house was built for laser tag.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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