Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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