You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize