I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize