Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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