Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
