New low: just hacked my moms facebook
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize