He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
