so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
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