I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
