it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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