I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
