Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
