I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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