maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Randomize